Okay, we are on the honor system, you watched the video correct?
I recently came across an article about Facebook and self-esteem. It reminded me that Facebook can affect people in different ways, for good and bad. For me, Facebook has been mostly a positive experience. However, as I began to think about my experiences, it reminded me that there is not only a good and bad, but an ugly side to Facebook as well.
The Good
It's no secret that I spend a great deal of time on Facebook. Too much, I know! However, I am thankful that Facebook came along at I time in my life when I needed a distraction. In many ways Facebook was my companion, in that, I could always log on and find something to read, something to listen to, and even someone to chat with.
Facebook has also been a blessing to me because it has allowed me to keep up with my family and friends, especially my children. Being able to log on to Facebook and see pictures of my grandsons playing tee-ball or riding their bikes or playing with their cars is worth any of the hassles that go along with social networking. I have also been blessed to be able to see pictures of my parents, nieces and nephews and even children of close friends.
Another good thing about Facebook is that it has provided a forum to catch up with former classmates from both high school and college. In 2010, I returned home to Yakima for my 30th high school Reunion. Facebook truly made it a deeper experience because prior to the reunion I was able to reconnect with many of my classmates. Facebook has also made it possible to have a mini-reunion with friends from Bible College. I even got the chance to meet up with one of my college friends and his son at a 49er/Seahawk game last year, all because of Facebook.
The goodest (I know that is not a word, but work with me here) part of Facebook then, can be summarized in one word, "connection." Facebook has allowed me to stay connected with people that are important to me.
The Bad
This article on Facebook Deal breakers does a nice job of summarizing some of the bad stuff about Facebook, and social networking in general. I just want to highlight a few.
2. Constant invites to play Farmville. See also: Bejeweled, Mafia Wars, Cafe World, or “Answer this question about me right now!”
PLEASE stop sending me game requests and I Heart You requests and quiz requests and so on. I think I have pretty much blocked all but the most obscure games. However, just when I think I have them all blocked, new ones pop up! There have been less than five times in my Facebook experience that I have had to block an individual and all of them have been for excessive game requests.
The whole Facebook game thing reminds me of a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode called "The Game." Here is the trailer for it.
And here's what the game looked like during the episode. This is you on Farmville.
"Just let it go"...
5. People who post vague status updates that sound like suicide notes. “Sometimes I wonder if it’s even worth it anymore…” is not an appropriate reaction to your boyfriend forgetting to buy milk.
Facebook does tend to bring out the drama Queens (and kings). We are all allowed to vent once in a while, but please, not every status update needs to be a Shakespearean level scene!
8. Being an a**hole. We all have a few friends who are quick to correct our grammar, make fun of our status updates, and start flame wars in comments sections. We should all stop being friends with these people.
Really, if you can't say something nice...on the other hand, a good snarky, sarcastic comment every so often doesn't make you a jerk. However, even I have to be careful about becoming what I call a "thread hijacker." It has taken a great deal of self-control, but I have learned to let a thread go by that I could easily "hijack." I do this out of respect for the person posting the thread. I know how much I hate it when that happens to me. So the golden rule of commenting should always be first and foremost in mind when deciding whether to comment or not on a thread. Now, if you say something so totally full of you-know-what, then this rule goes out the window.
13. Compulsive check-ins. Stephanie checked in at Starbucks. Stephanie checked in at work. Stephanie checked in at the conference room. Stephanie checked in at the park. Stephanie checked in at the grocery store. Stephanie checked in at the movie theater. Stephanie checked in at Stephanie’s house. Stephanie is not our friend anymore.
I am guilty on this one, although I try to limit my check-ins to no more than one a day and two or three times a week if I can help it. Oh, and my machaca check-ins do not count!
14. People who treat all their Facebook friends as potential customers. We wish you the best of luck with the sex toy party business, but we’d rather not be invited to five of them per week.
No one is more free-enterprise than I am. I gladly accept friend requests from businesses that I am comfortable with...however, please do not pop up on chat and ask me if you can meet with me to show me this great new way to earn money. Please don't MLM me on Facebook. PS. I have a post coming on Multilevel Marketing or MLM soon.
15. Conspiracy theorists. 9/11 was an inside job. Obama was born in Kenya. Why are we friends with you, again?
17. Politics overload. We love a rousing political discussion, but using Facebook to bombard your friends with all politics, all the time, is totally exhausting.
Number 15 and 17 tend to go together. I can tell what "news sources" you've been reading based on all of the links that you post. All of my liberal friends read Talking Points Memo, Huffington Post, the New York Times and the Washington Post and all of my conservative friends read the Daily Caller, Breitbart, the Wall Street Journal and National Review Online. I know where you are coming from already before I read the link you posted.
This has been the hardest one for me because I have a real passion for politics and I definitely have my political viewpoint. One of the reasons I started my blog again is so that I could post political articles without starting a flame war. All of the political back and forth was exhausting for me (I do have a day job!) and it took much of the fun out of Facebook for me. That's not to say that there isn't a place for politics on Facebook...just not all of the time!
20. Negative Nancys. “I just can’t catch a break.” “Why do I even try?” “Same s**t, different day.” Dude, you are killing my life buzz.
Like the drama in number two on the list, we are all entitled to a bad day once in a while, but some people need a dose of the glass half-fulls!
Just to end on a positive note, I wanted to share an article describing the five signs that you might be a Facebook Stalker. We should all take heed!
The Ugly
When it comes to Facebook there is a tendency on the part of many (myself included) to overdo the sharing. I like to live my life transparently. I am who I am and I try not to be anythings else, but...more and more employers and others are using Facebook as a way to check your character. I have shared articles in the past, about how many employers are asking for interviewee's Facebook passwords as a part of the interview process. This has to give one pause when you think about what you should post on your wall. Personally, if I was asked for my Facebook log-in information at an interview, I would get up and walk out. Although I have nothing to hide, I think this is a breech of my personal rights. Unfortunately though, our cyber life is there for most to see. If you are unsure about what your online profile says about you, you should do a google search, this will also help you see how many of your Facebook posts are showing up on the Internet.
So there you have it, the Good, the Bad and the Ugly of Facebook...at least, according to this Jim.
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